I recently was out when I ran into a female friend I haven’t seen in a long time (let’s call her Stacy). Stacy is a young. lean, hot bodied blonde that is about 6’1 with baby blue eyes. She ended up being a waitress at this establishment, but it was a slow day, so I did get to spend some time catching up with her.
She was asking my advice on how to attract a more dominant man (a common question by readers and friends alike).
She had recently gotten out of a several year relationship (she has one kid with the guy) and had just started dating again. I could tell by talking with her, she is not really over her ex, and he wants her back. It sounds like he is too nice to her though.
Anyway, she went on to tell me about the last date she gave the “Let’s Just Be Friends” speech to. She said she met this guy from work, and he asked to take her out to eat. She said he was a few years older, owned his own business and was “really cute”. But there was just no spark. After the date he kept calling her and texting her to the point she gave him the classic LJBF speech along with the “I’m just not ready to date” speech.
I asked her what happened and she explained that during the date, the conversation came up of what each person was looking for.
Stacy told him she wasn’t really sure, as she had just gotten out of a relationship and just wanted to “have fun for awhile.”
For those of you that don’t know, a girl that is just getting out of a relationship that says she just wants to have fun wants you to challenge her. To tease her, be playful and above all things, stay away from putting any importance on a relationship with her. It may happen, but never make it your focus.
Anyway, his response is one I have actually heard many a man say. Want to guess what he said?
He told her, “I will take whatever you can give me.”
As soon as she said it, I cringed. I know exactly what this communicated and exactly what it made her feel.
He may have meant, “I am an understanding man willing to put in the time to help you heal. I promise not to push, I just want you to be happy.”
She heard, or rather, felt, “I am a pussy that is so desperate I am willing to put up with whatever shit you want to feed me just to be around you. I will take you out, buy you stuff, and I will wait forever to have sex. I am a nice guy that will slowly make love to you and ask how it feels rather than pushing you against a wall and fucking you with raw desire.”
He didn’t say this, but this is what he communicated with his words and body language.
Of course she didn’t feel a spark for him. He took all of the potential sexual tension out of the interaction, then he dramatically demonstrated low value. No tension, no high value and you have no attraction.
As I have said many times – women don’t date their equals.
They do date those men that seem to have higher social standing – as in preselection with a lot of women sleeping with him.
It’s not money, looks, clothes, cars, or anything else. It IS HOW YOU MAKE HER FEEL.
If you have money and make her feel attraction, she will like you.
If you don’t have money and make her feel attraction, she will like you just as much.
If you have money and don’t make her feel attraction, she may use you to take her out, but she will fuck someone else.
The simple truth is, life will give you whatever you demand of it. Sure, you have to put in the effort, but if you demand a certain life, more often than not you will get it.
Women are no different. If you hold yourself to a certain standard, then communicate that standard to her, she will likely do whatever you want.
However, if you communicate that your standards are so low you will take whatever crumbs she is willing to throw at you, then don’t expect anything.
You can either be the Alpha lover, or the “friend”. It is your life to choose.