Have you ever wondered why so many nice guys literally get destroyed in their relationships with no understanding of what just happened?
Have you ever wondered why you are where you are, making what you do, knowing you should be able to do more?
Ever wondered why some guys that just aren’t very bright or seem to have much financial (stable) status have an easy time with women?
Ever wonder why the nice, stable, grounded and supportive man rarely gets the second date
(unless of course she needs you to pay for children she already has)?
These were questions that haunted me after my first divorce and $8 million dollar bankruptcy.
I spent countless hours searching for the answer. I read hundreds of books, spent thousands of dollars and talked to every guru that seemed to have a handle on their life.
I can give you the secret. I can tell you exactly why you aren’t having the success in love, life, business, wealth, health or anything else.
All failure and success hinges on subconscious patterns. Habits if you will. Now don’t stop reading just yet. Let me explain a bit.
You Were Programmed For Failure
Patterns literally control our life. In my material I spend a large amount of time teaching NLP including patterns, pattern interrupts, embedded commands, subliminal programming and reframing all so people will be able to reprogram their mind. I teach exactly how you retrain the subconscious to achieve these Alpha Male Traits
If you haven’t realized the truth about your patterns and never actively sought to change your behavior, then you are likely running on programming that you didn’t even install.
Did you catch that. This is programming and patterns that you did not install. It was installed for you.
These are the beliefs and habits that keep you down. I know, you think you are wide awake and seeing the world clearly, while I would bet you haven’t even opened your eyes from your dream state yet.
Did you know, most of you are walking through the world functioning on patterns that others programmed you with? When you were a child, you were curious. You were a sponge soaking up patterns to understand and survive in this complicated world. And those around you, while trying to help, gave you some shitty programming.
Want to know why you are overweight? Your parents (or guardians) taught you some shitty eating habits. Staying lean and muscular isn’t hard at all if you know just a couple of simple rules and change your mental frames.
Want to know why you are shy? Your parents and those around you at a young age programmed you that way. “Momma can I… ” “Quite, don’t talk while I am….” “Daddy, will you…. ” “Shhh… not while the game is on.” I hate to say it but my son became very shy at about 3. It was from my shy wife and my overbearing and structured nature. I realized this and worked to rebuild those patterns in his life. Now he is not shy at all and better with women than a 13 year old should be – haha!
Want to know why you don’t get along with a lot of people? Your parents and those around you stifled your ability to communicate and did so in a way as to make your feel like less of a person. By stopping communication while also impacting your ego negatively you tend to learn a pattern of not being very social.
Want to know why you suck with the ladies? Because your parents, those around you and the media all programmed you to be more docile. Your natural masculine curiosity and adventurous nature were suppressed as you were programmed with more “humorous” and easier to manipulate programming.
Lots of sports don’t keep score so we don’t damage male children’s ego – but we suppress the natural aggressive desire to succeed. We don’t let kids play with toy weapons, because violence is bad. This changes the natural pattern of confidence building that men have relied on since we began walking upright. The constant “don’t be aggressive, confident or successful” teachings create an entire society of weak men running on limiting patterns that hold them back and down.
Want to know why you are not rich? You have been programmed with patterns that prevent you from being wealthy. Some were told “You are never going to be anything but a ditch digger” – like I was at 18. Others were told, “If you go to school and get a degree you will get a nice job”. Both of these and everything in between creates a mental pattern that you operate by. No risk taking, no seeing opportunities as they present themselves, just a pattern of trodding along.
Want to know why most of you want to get married and have one woman? You were programmed your entire childhood to believe that is what you are supposed to do… by the media, your parents, sister, and culture as a whole. If you really think about it, you have chosen very few if any of your mental programming.
Most of you even believe in the religion you do because someone important to you programmed you to believe that was what you do. Very, very few people study many religions before deciding on one that they believe is “true” or works for them.
You speak English because you grew up around English speakers. It was the pattern you were taught. If you had been born in China you would speak Chinese and adopt their cultural patterns as you grew up.
Now most, if not all the people early in your life didn’t mean to program your patterns for failure. Most of them wanted you to be successful, have a great wife, family, business and whatever else they thought would be good for you. These patterns that they taught you were meant to protect you or, in most cases, were simply the programming they grew up with. Yes culture can impact that programming, which is why I am so against the media that constantly displays men and fathers as bumbling, weak idiots or as psychotic rapist.
But for the most part, your mental programming was installed in you by those around you at an early age. Some people got good programming, some got horrible programming, and most of us got less than desirable programming.
Many people learn to change their programming, but most people are just walking through life in a hypnotic trance. If you have read any of my material, or any material on the subconscious mind you know, for a fact, that it operates on autopilot patterns. You don’t have to think about eating, running, putting on clothes, brushing your teeth, shaving or anything else. Usually, you conscious mind is daydreaming or thinking of other situations while you do these activities. These are your patterns.
Meet a girl feel some attraction and then get told “I like you but just as a friend”… learned pattern.
No matter how hard you work you only seem to be getting by… learned pattern.
The great news is once you understand this, you will start seeing patterns in everything. How your friends, family, boss, girls, teachers, etc. all act and follow their own mental programming. That allows you to do two very important things.
First, it allows you the opportunity to see what patterns are not working for you and install new patterns. Changing mental road-maps are not easy, but once you learn the pattern of change, you can accelerate your personal changes. That’s mostly what I teach on this site.
Secondly, as you recognize the patterns of others it will allow you to communicate more fully. I hate to use the word manipulate because of the negative feelings associated with it, so let’s call it “influence”. As you see patterns you can influence those around you to positively follow your lead and do what you want. A great skill for sales, business, advertising, seduction, fatherhood, husband-hood, and anything else you can think of.
You can create a life of success of your own vision. Women, money, whatever you want. You can go from a failure to a success simply by learning new patterns. You don’t need to learn a pickup line, but a pattern of physical attraction. You don’t need to win the lottery, simply create a pattern for financial attraction.
You do not live in reality – most of us don’t. You live in a subset of perceived reality based on your beliefs and patterns. Don’t believe me? Ever bought a new car, and then start to notice that car all over the place? That is a perception change based on your recognition patterns, not reality. The cars were always there, you just started to notice them.
Now, here is the bad news. Before you knew this, it wasn’t your fault. You could blame your parents, family, friends, media, government and life for your miserable results. But now you know this, you have no one to blame but yourself.
Now is your time to start creating your patterns.