Thank you so much Alpha!
Actually it’s a great question.
Everything, all of life, dating, Alpha, business, success, achievement, and anything else really comes down to how you view the situation and the meaning you attach to it. Everything is how both your conscious and subconscious mind sees you and the event.
The big difference between a successful person and a failure is how they view the event and what they do about it. A failure will try something, it won’t work, and they get emotionally hurt and stop trying.
A success tries something, it doesn’t work, so they look at what elements or variables could be changed to increase the odds of a successful outcome. They then try again. And again, and again and so on till they finally figure it out.
This has been my key to my life. I decide what I want, then I learn and try till I get what I want.
I have had thousands of life events that could be seen as failures (many of them sure did feel like it at the time). Many times I have felt like a HUGE failure – primarily before all of the self-education in attraction, the subconscious mind and achievement.
For example, when I first went thru my $8 million dollar bankruptcy, I saw it as a huge failure. I felt I had let down my employees, investors and my family. I also felt I lost what was attractive about me to the opposite sex. With time and wisdom, that experience has taught me how to save other companies and to this day I have saved 4 different companies and over 1000 jobs.
I no longer see that moment as failure; I see it as training for bigger task I had to take on later in life.
If you have read any of my life story, you know the primary reason I began this journey into Alpha was the failure of my marriage. And make no mistake about it, any man that truly loves and desires a woman will feel the sting of failure if she leaves him. Or cheats on him. Or betrays him in any other way.
As for the family, I have never lived the standard 9-5, white house, 2.3 kid’s type of life. For a while different members of my family did give me a hard time… to pick one job and stay there forever, or to settle with one woman, and probably the biggest was to stop dating younger women. Almost every member of my family has expressed displeasure in my dating younger women. They did so more when my mental frame wasn’t as solid as it is today, but they do still sometimes verbally disapprove.
But in my mind, I just don’t care. I love my family, and I always thank them for their input and views… and I keep right on doing whatever I want. I haven’t had a “job” in years…. I own my own business so I have clients. And I make more than half of my family at the moment…. But I spend my money on sports cars, motorcycles, travel and guns… not houses with white picket fences.
Something else you really need to learn, digest and keep with you at all times… you don’t “make” other people happy. They either choose to be happy, or they choose not to be happy. Sure, your actions may impact which way they may swing, but in the end, they are the ones that decide. Once you know this, you will find you feel freer and have more abundance. Their unhappiness is not your problem and out of your control.
Once upon a time, a girl I really loved cheated on me. The old me was devastated. I felt like less of a man, or the guy that couldn’t keep his woman satisfied. Recently a girlfriend left me to fuck another guy. I was offended at her choice, but after a bit of thinking, I just thanked my lucky stars I found out before having more of a life with her that may have reduced my assets and or cost me more time and energy. In a way, that girl did me a favor by showing me who she really was.
Rather than diminish my self-esteem, it made me feel smarter and luckier since I hadn’t married her (with her asking a lot), or invested in her too much. These days I feel better prepared in dealing with new women I meet since I have more experience and I understand the dynamics of why some people do what they do.
Come to think of it, I have probably been rejected more than any man or woman that has read this site. How can I say this? Easy… I approach and meet more people than anyone I have ever met. I have also probably been with more hot girls than anyone reading this site. Since I have been rejected more, am I a success or failure? See what I mean about attaching meaning to an event?
As for getting old… please. I am 20 years older than you and I feel young. I have a very hot girlfriend (younger than you) and I am still hit on by other girls. Had a cute 22 year old randomly give me her number the other day…. Not my kind of girl, but I loved the feeling. This happens to me more now than when I was 27. Once again, whatever you have in your life is what it is for right now… but how you feel about it is up to you. You and you alone, decide what meaning you give to the events in your life.
And think of it this way, I am older, I have severe nerve damage, not as strong, fast or lean as I use to be. However all of life’s lessons have taught me to focus on what I want and the positives around me. This allows me to keep my energy, vibe and general life better. That and I truly feel my wisdom and raw masculine energy more than make up for any reductions in youthful ability. This is how I see myself, and pretty much everyone else is going to see you like you see you.
My last thought on this is to keep in mind these are not excuses for failure. I am always looking for ways to build my business, hone my skills, learn more about relationships and generally enjoy a deeper life. I make mistakes, I fuck up, I let people down and people let me down. The key is to see these as opportunities to improve, to learn to be a better man, and keep sharing your positive energy with the world.
A secret everyone should learn is you attract whatever you focus on. If you focus and place meaning on your life as a failure since you don’t have kids, the “white picket fence” life or the success other people do, you will attract failure.
If, on the other hand, you believe that the skills you are learning now will make your relationships and success that much deeper and bigger, you will attract success and deeper relationships.
It really is all up to you.