Another key concept is “Attraction is Not A Choice”. Ok, to really understand how this all works, you have to have one big underlying belief and frame (mental state) – Attraction is not a choice. Men and women are wired differently (no big surprise there), and we look for subtle cues as we interact, but we do not logically decide who we are attracted too.
I think David DeAngelo said it first, and as I have learned, attraction TRULY isn’t a choice.
So let’s take a look at how most men approach the idea of women and dating.
First, men think they have to be a “nice guy” to a girl so she will like them. WRONG (more on this later). But most guys have the belief they have to be nice to a woman. I’m not sure where all the bullshit of buying a woman presents or treating her nice came from. Probably Hollywood. Opening doors, buying her flowers, pulling out her chair, etc. All of it’s great to do for someone who reciprocates back to you and already desires you – like your wife or long time lover (and still in moderation). But in the beginning, the more you supplicate, the more you are telling her she is the prize, and worth more than you. And that simply will not make her vagina wet and tingle for you.
If she doesn’t feel the tingle, then she will not feel attracted to you. She may like you as a friend, but not feel attracted to you as a lover – and she will be disappointed in you for making her feel this way. If you are one of those guys that keeps hearing “Let’s just be friends” or “You are the perfect guy and I am sure you will find the right girl sometime”, then you are likely displaying traits that portray you as nice and safe beta, but not the strong and sexual Alpha.
I know, doesn’t seem logical. Why wouldn’t a girl want someone to take her to dinner, buy flowers, bring her gifts, open her doors, and treat her like a princess? Well, she does, but only after you have her attracted to you and your bold Alpha traits, and only as a reward. Remember her underlying evolution. Her holier than holies will only moistens up for the Alpha male.
See women are not logical (I know another huge shock there!).
They are emotional. They want to feel. Steady state emotions are not typically what a woman wants to feel. In addition, they can sense your intentions. They can sense if you opened the door, brought them flowers, and bought them a drink in the hopes of getting into their panties, or if you have done it because it of your raw masculine energy (Alpha). If you are an Alpha, then she will sense you didn’t do it to get laid, and this places you in a stronger frame than the “I gave to you, know you give to me” frame.
Have you ever had someone who wanted something from you. They didn’t come right out and say “May I have this?”, but they sorta hinted, and made small comments and you knew exactly what they wanted. Well, when you are taking a girl out, bringing flowers and buying her stuff, she knows what you want. You either want to show her you are a nice guy so she will like you and fuck you OR you want to buy her emotions so she will like you and fuck you.
You would be better off just walking up and saying, “I want to fuck you.” I have, and it works better than supplicating.
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